


Intimately

by sv4me



Category: Avengers
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-24
Updated: 2013-01-25
Packaged: 2017-11-26 18:53:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/653361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sv4me/pseuds/sv4me
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Instead of Natasha's "cognitive recalibration," Clint pins her down, literally. Just how intimate will Clint be? A what-if. Will be multiple chapters. My first attempt at fanfic, please be kind. Avengers MovieVerse, Clint & Natasha / Hawkeye & Blackwidow focus. MA rating, be warned, adult themes, rape & intense situations, etc. Spoiler-no character death. Some fluff later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fear

Chapter 1: Fear  
“Hawkeye is heading towards the detention bay, does anybody copy??”  
Natasha heard the desperation in the director’s voice. Things really were falling apart.  
She didn’t move at first, despite Fury’s plea. You need to move, Widow she told herself. The pain and fear from her bout with the Hulk (ok, it wasn’t so much of a bout as her running for her life) had frozen her. This just doesn’t happen. The Black Widow is not incapacitated by fear. But there she sat, shaking.  
A different type of fear violently took hold of her, pushing her into action. “This is Agent Romanov. I copy.” She started moving.  
\--------  
She ran through the passages and corridors, with a particular goal in mind. She knew the best location to confront Clint strategically, a bottle neck where he would be unable to effectively use his bow and she would have the edge on close-quarters combat. He would have to go this way en route to Loki’s detainment bay, and it was her one chance to get to him before he freed Loki and they both disappeared again, perhaps forever. She ignored the pain in her leg as she moved, propelled by fear. Fear of losing what she had come to take for granted. Fear of losing her one anchor in this world, her one friend. Fear of what she would have to do to him.  
She had known that she regarded Clint as a friend, her first friend, before Loki’s arrival. She had sprung into action at Phil’s words, “Barton’s been compromised.” She had been ready to take on the world to save her friend, to repay him for the new purpose he had given her in life, for saving her from her hell. But as the days wore on and myth became reality and science melded into magic, she had felt powerless. The Black Widow is not powerless. But there it was. It was something she was not trainer for, something she could never prepare for. There was nothing she could do. She felt powerless.  
Then the mistress of lies and deceit had met her match. The Black Widow had been tortured, threatened, shot and stabbed more times than she could count. She had seduced, conned, exploited and killed the most notorious and untouchable men on the planet. But Loki was not of this world. His words had cut straight to the heart that she had forgotten she even had.  
“I won’t touch Barton, not until I make him kill you.”  
That was a new one, and it had caught her a bit off guard. But then, The Black Widow hadn’t allowed herself to trust anyone before Clint. She thought she had kept him at arm’s length enough so that no one would know to try and use him against her, but then again she hadn’t ever imagined someone would be able to take over his mind and glean in information directly from him.  
“Slowly, intimately, in every way he knows you fear.”  
Sure, she’d been threatened and tortured before, but no one knew her like Clint did. He knew what she could withstand, but also knew what she could not.  
“And then he’ll wake, just long enough to see his good work…”  
Horror flooded her being. She allowed her face to crack, unable to control it. She could face pain, torture, and even her own death. But where Loki was going was much, much worse.  
“And when he screams, I’ll split his skull!”  
The words echoed in her ears as she ran. She would not, could not, allow this to happen to Clint.  
They faced death and danger in their work constantly, and that she could accept. She had known that one day she would be killed in the field or Clint would go down, never to rise again. But this? To have her life slowly edge away at her friend’s hand, who would then be broken by grief for his actions? No. She would kill him first.  
Such a thought wasn’t without pain. Her newly discovered heart began to ache at the thought of life without Clint. She knew she would be doing him a kindness if he could not be released from the spell, and that if there was any of him left in there he would appreciate it. She knew he would do the same for her. But to go on? What reason would there be?  
Stop it, she told herself. It was useless going down this line of thought. She had a job to do. If he was to live, she had to do it with the cold, calculated precision of the Black Widow. She ran through a doorway into a medium sized storage room with a high ceiling. Almost there, just two more rooms…  
White hot pain erupted in her left calf, knocking her to the ground. She let out a scream, unable to control it, as she went crashing into a shipping crate, the half-opened and empty container shattering around her. She’s been shot before, but this was different. She writhed on the floor amongst the splintered pieces of wood, and reached for her leg. A thin fiberglass shaft protruded from either side of her calf.  
Oh Shit.  
\---------  
Oh shit indeed! Thank you for reading and any follows/favs. Reviews needed, as this is my first try at this. Reviews = better writing and another chapter! (but do be gentle. First time and all).   
(originally posted on FF.net)


	2. Pinned

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> M rating. Includes violence, language, sex, sexual violence, intense situations, possible rape & death (but I don’t want to give too much away!), etc. Be warned.   
> Disclaimer: Yeah, I don’t own any of this. Not making any money from writing this. It’s solely for entertainment/education/etc. and to encourage discussion of the AWESOME movie! The only thing I’d hope to gain from writing and posting this is that the true creative geniuses at Marvel decide to eventually get Clint and Natasha to admit their feelings for each other in a future movie. Everyone should go buy the Avengers movie. Then buy it for all your friends and family for Christmas. Make these guys good money so they can invest in the next awesome movie with Hawkeye & the Widow! (Good enough disclaimer/free advertising Marvel? ) Also, everyone should go to the Marvel website and post in the forums that we demand this awesome SHIP sail!!  
> (Note: in this chapter I jump back and forth in POVs, and show Clint imprisoned in his own mind in italics. Hope it’s not too confusing. Anyway, here we go!) Enjoy chapter 2!

Chapter 2: Pinned

He smirked, jumping down from his perch to approach his prey. That was far too easy. He just knew her too well. 

You fucking piece of shit! How dare you hurt her! Walk away now! I’ll kill you, I’ll fucking kill you! 

He chuckled to himself. Kill me? Silly, small voice. Why do you persist in your feeble attempts at fighting? You have been set free. Don’t pretend that you don’t want what I’m going to do. Don’t pretend you haven’t spent many a restless night dreaming of it…

XOX

(Several days ago)

Loki has pulled him out and pushed him aside, but also gave him back control. Sort of. Clint could feel the excitement from every kill he had made for Loki. He relished in the thrill of the hunt, of surprising his marks. It had been so easy, knowing all that he did. He cherished being totally free, in releasing what conscience he had and finally getting to indiscriminately practice his craft just for the fun of it, not caring who it was or for what purpose. Loki aimed, and he fired, straight and true, and it was glorious. 

He even enjoyed sharing all the secrets he knew of SHIELD and the other Avengers prospects with Loki. He enjoyed knowing that he was a part of finally putting them in their place. But then Loki had started to ask about Nat. 

Some of the thrill ebbed when Loki asked about the Black Widow. Something had changed. He couldn’t identify it at first; it was like a faint mist on the horizon. He answered all of Loki’s questions, but no more, failing to volunteer information that he knew would be helpful The mist grew, and Clint felt confused. Loki noticed.   
“Ah, and we come to the Crux of yourself, Agent Barton,” Loki had said with a smile on his face. He walked over. “Agent Romanov. A beautiful, deadly woman. Your woman?”

“No sir,” the truth, of course. A pause. Clint knew he should give his master more information, but the fog, the damn fog was getting so thick, it was hard to think…

“But?” Loki tilted his head to the side. He was grinning now, coming even closer. Clint reengaged eye contact, coming out of the fog. 

“Sir?” 

“But, there is more you are not telling me about Agent Romanov. Much more, I think…” 

The fog was forming again. “What would you like to know sir?”

Loki paused, slowly walking around his subject. He cocked his head to the side again, as if in thought. “Tell me, do you want her?”

The fog thickened and Clint thought he could almost hear screaming in the distance. “I don’t understand sir, what do you mean?”

“Do you desire her Barton?” Loki’s eyes narrowed, an almost snarl forming on his face. “Did you lay awake at night dreaming of kissing her, of taking her to bed, of fucking her until she calls out your name?”

Yes, that was definitely screaming, and it was filling Clint’s head. With that and all the fog it was difficult to concentrate, to answer, to even keep his eyes open. Clint stumbled slightly, bringing his hand to his head. “Sir, I…” He squeezed his eyes. “I, I don’t know what to say, I…” he fell his knees, clutching his head in pain. 

“Ah yes, we have come to it indeed.” Loki didn’t act surprised. He put his hand on Clint’s shoulder, almost concern in his eyes. “It can be difficult, my faithful subject, letting go of it all. Tell me, Agent Barton, do you love her?” 

The screaming overtook him and he fell face first to the ground. The screaming voice became his own. “You, you, you... you leave her alone!” 

Loki grabbed him by his collar and held him in the air with little effort. “You will answer me, Barton!” 

Clint let go of Loki’s arms and clutched his head. “Noooo! Get out! Getoutgetoutgetoutgetout…!”

Loki threw him across the room, ending the tirade. He walked towards Clint, who was catching his breath, grabbing his scepter on the way.

“It’s a shame, really, that some meaningless bitch of a mortal would keep you from true freedom.” He came closer, and Clint staggered to his feet. “But, if I can’t release your entire mind, I will push aside what’s left.”

The scepter touched him a second time, and Clint froze. He was screaming inside his own mind. Loki separated this part of him from the rest, and pushed him aside, locking him in a prison within his own mind. “Of course I could just destroy this part of you, but sadly it is too much of you and would kill you. I do need to keep you around a little longer. It’s a real shame though; it’s been lovely to see you work uninhibited.” 

Since then Clint tried to stop himself from the carnage, but he was powerless. He even felt the joy and exhilaration the rest of him experienced as he worked for Loki. His voice responded to every question Loki asked, regardless of how loud he shouted to shut up. He provided every analysis Loki needed, giving the best tactical advice, regardless of how hard he tried to stop. He told him everything about Natasha he wanted to know, and even more than necessary. He enjoyed every bit of it, even as he held the bars of his prison screaming. 

XOX

(back to present)

You fucking piece of shit! How dare you hurt her! Walk away now! I’ll kill you, I’ll fucking kill you! He chuckled to himself. Kill me? Silly, small voice.   
Clint walked towards Natasha. She was prone on the floor, clutching her bloody calf. He had sent an arrow straight through her. His friend. His rock. His love.   
She propped herself up on her other hand, looking towards him. The fear in her eyes changed to determination. She wasn’t going to lay down without a fight of course. That made him smile. He reached for his quiver.

“NOOOOO!” It really was no use screaming at himself, and he released the arrow into her free arm just below the wrist, pinning it to the large broken piece of crate she was laying on. She screamed out again in agony, and he grinned. What fun prey she is. She moved her hand from her leg to her pinned arm. Her eyes shifted from determination to panic. She looked towards her hunter.

XOX

“Ah Natasha,” he spoke with a voice that was his, but not his own. She had never heard such malevolence from him. “My sweet, precious Natasha. You have come for me, but I have been waiting for you.” 

Oh, so not good. He knew her too well. He had even anticipated where she would attempt to ambush him, and had got to her first. She looked to her arm, pinned to the ground by Hawkeye’s arrow. Missed an artery. She still had time. Think Natasha, think. She only had a limited window now, and needed a new plan fast if she was to free Clint. Or, as a last resort, kill him.

Keep him talking. “Hawkeye,” her voice cracked in pain, but she managed a smirk. “I guess I deserve that for all those times I’ve made fun of your arrows.”

“Ah, sweet Widow,” he crooned, his voice even more creepy than before, if that was possible. He continued his slow advance. “You disappoint me. Stalling and memories will get you nowhere.” Shut up you son of a bitch! Shut up! Leave her alone! I’ll kill you!

“You know me far too well, Barton,” (maybe he won’t notice) “but are you sure you know me well enough?” she held his eyes, those strange eyes that were not his, as she moved, making the appearance of trying to sit up. 

“Taunting will get you nowhere, Nat,” she hated how this Loki-enslaved Clint used one of her nicknames. “And I know what you’re doing.” She froze. Of course. He knows where she hides all her knives. “How about we even things up a little, shall we?”

He pulled a gun from his hip holster and held it in his hand. “Could you even kill me, if given the chance?” 

Shit. He really did know her too well. He knew the battle that was raging inside of her. “Could you point this gun and pull the trigger? After all we’ve been through? After all we have been? After all we… could be?” He was fueling the fire, getting her off balance. “Let’s see.”

He tossed the gun at her, and she reacted. Too late. As she moved her free arm to catch the gun an arrow sliced through her shoulder. Pain slammed into her again. She should have seen that one coming. She knew how quick he was with his quiver. She’d even seen him do this exact trick before. Well shit.   
As the pain temporarily hazed her vision she missed him as he ran, making up the yards separating them, and leapt onto her chest, knocking out her wind. As she struggled to breath he pulled one of her knives from its sheath and stood. He kicked her free arm out and stood on it with his boot, an evil glint in his eye. Natasha registered the look far too late. 

You bastard! I’ll kill you! I’ll kill you! I’ll fucking…

He plunged her own knife through her free hand, pinning her to the ground. 

XOX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh Clint! Poor Nat! This isn’t going well for them. Will things get better next chapter?


End file.
